Sex. In Detail.

December 20, 2008

Suction Lovin

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , — stevie @ 6:31 pm
Boy I Love (BIL) and I were talking about the best kind of holiday sale. It has been a multi-day, casually continued conversation. I think it started with the Babeland slogan “The holidays are coming… and you can too!” (A poly friend gave a mono friend a holiday card with that slogan on it. Laughter ensued. Toys on the brain also ensued.)
BIL mentioned that he and a friend of his were perusing a catalogue. Apparently there is such a thing as a 17-piece suction cup set. I’m fascinated by this. How big are the suction cups? Where exactly am I supposed to put 17 of them? I have two nipples, a clit, … um… an ass, I guess… ten toes? Do suction cups go between toes? Are they little?
I wonder what it would feel like to have the insides of my elbows and knees suction cupped. Is that the sort of thing they had in mind?
There’s a 14-piece set. What I want to know is, Who’s the person who thought to him- or herself, “What this set really needs is three more suction cups.”
Maybe I’m supposed to suction BIL’s body parts too. Ooo, maybe we’re supposed to suction ourselves together! How charming! Nothing says making love like some suction cup popping. “Do you feel me? No, way deep down, do you feel how much I care? [Shww-pop] How ’bout now? You feel that amazing loving suction?”

November 13, 2008

My first entry, starting right at the bottom

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , — stevie @ 10:41 am
Hellllllo world! This isn’t necessarily my first blog, but it’s my first quasi-official one.
I’m not sure what counts as an appropriate introductory topic, so I’m just going to go with what’s on my mind at the moment: Butt Plugs. Butts and the things that plug them, that’s what I’m talking about.
I have to admit that I’m not the world’s hugest fan of anal. I’m no virgin, mind you, but I’m not the kind of gal who’s comfortable just popping in a plug and then going shopping with a sly grin. I take a little bit of warm up, a lot of bit of lube, and sometimes a long deep breath before I go reaching for an anal probe.
I’m also way not into sharing toys. Not happening. So I’ve been shopping around for the perfect plug, hoping for that Goldie Locks moment to come along. My first attempt was a large glass item. I figured, hey, smooth is good, and durability is a plus - but, oh Lord, it was way too big for what I have going on down there. Next! I was cruising around a local sex shop and was promised that the small little purple plug was silicone and would be plenty firm if I shoved a bullet vibe in there. So home I went, with my new purple friend and bullet vibe friend of a friend, only to find out that … erm… it didn’t smell as silicone should. Moving on.
I settled on a little NJoy plug (http://www.njoytoys.com/pdfs/NJ_Pure_Plugs_spec.pdf). It’s a cutie. And if stainless steel is good enough for the dentist to keep sterile, then it’s good enough for my butt. I think this is the perfect starter size. Now I need to come up with a way for it to not feel so cold when I first stick it in there (sure, I could put it in boiling water or something, but how sexy is that? “Oh, boiling water, you turn me on… you’re so HOT….”). I’m also wondering if I’ll ever stop being paranoid about the damn thing feeling like it’s going to pop out if I wiggle wrong.
Life is hard. Stainless steel hard, in fact.

Powered by WordPress