Polyadventurous. What a lovely word that is. Jakob used it in the latest podcast to describe himself. It’s perfect for him, and I think it fits me pretty well too—though he is more adventurous than I am. In number of partners, certainly, but also some of his experiences are ones that I’m not willing to try.
I don’t keep a spreadsheet, but I do write in a journal several times a week, and in that way I’m able to keep a record of my sexual and loving experiences (sometimes those overlap and sometimes not). I’m really glad to have the record, especially when things get rough with a partner, or a relationship ends altogether, to remind me of the good experiences we had. People tend to talk and write about things that are difficult, about problems and hurdles. Indeed, these are often more interesting to outsiders than the happy moments because they have tension, drama, excitement. On the other hand, most people like to talk about sex.
I want to write more in response to Jakob’s appearance on the podcast, but I have a naked man tied to my bed waiting for me. Another time.
“It wasn’t, he swore, that he picked up so many women…. It was just that he never put any down.” — Lois McMaster Bujold, Mirror Dance